The Making of a Short Sci-Fi Story. “Sporelings” – Part II – 1st draft

I am currently taking a short story fundamentals class online. I decided to write about this experience in a series of blog entries that will document my journey as I develop a short science fiction story as part of my class experience.


Hello, everyone! Happy New Year! Whew! The Holidays sure blew by very fast! But I, like most people, got caught up in all the things we get caught up in over the holiday time and am a bit late on this second installment of “Sporelings.”

As I mentioned in my last post, I am taking an online class about writing short stories and am developing one as part of the class assignments. I plan to post this short story as it develops and also the revisions based on the feedback to show how piece changes based on input from editing, critique utilized, etc.

If you missed this first post in this series, Part I – 1st draft of the story is located here: Sporelings – Part 1 of 3 – First Draft.

I decided to post Part II as written- in other words before edits or revisions to Part I took place because at this stage potential revisions to Part I don’t affect Part II. I’ll continue this idea with Part III, then we’ll go back to Part I with the revisions stage. This should give us a clear understanding of how the piece develops through the revision, critique, and editing process. The last post in this series will be the final draft.

Just to recant a bit from the last post, this short story is a work of science fiction. It will be written in three parts. Part I will introduce a grim future. where some cataclysmic event will change the world. This will be a world-building setup and quick character introduction. Part II will cover the last few minutes of. In other words, what happens as a result of this drastic change. Part III is what comes next. How does this world continue after a cataclysmic event? What does the future now have in store?

The working title is “Sporelings” and the first draft of Part II is presented below.

Image result for underground government bunker

“Sporelings” – Part II – 1st draft

Three months later.

Nathan pressed his cheek against the car window and strained to look up at the sky as high as possible with the windows rolled up. He saw nothing unusual, just blue sky. Something caught his attention out of the corner of his eye. All the color drained from Nathan’s face when he saw the side of a large mountain fast approaching in the middle of the road. The car was racing straight into what he could only describe as a huge mountain of rock where the road suddenly turned into a dead end.

Nathan’s mouth gaped open in an almost scream and just before panic set in, the car deaccelerated for a few brief moments as a twelve-foot area of concrete began to separate. Instead of dead-ending into the large mountain, Nathan realized the road they were driving down led to an underground government facility.  As the car moved closer to the mountain it passed through an automatic chain-link gate speeding between the opening as thick concrete doors slowly parted and with just barely enough room, the car flew through. Nathan looked back and saw the caravan follow them.

After Nathan inadvertently released the sporelings several months ago, the first thing he did was contact the British Ministry of Defense. Minister Kettle did not know what to do so he immediately called the U.S. Department of Defense at the Pentagon in Washington DC. As the world started to crumble and cities started to fall the US government was still able to secure passage for Nathan and his crew, the British leadership as well as leaders from a few other European countries to come to the Pentagon.  Nathan’s face twitched, and his eyes became unfocused at the memory of the debriefing, no the god damned interrogation by the US officials.


“Tell me again, Mr. Gray. What happened when you touched the golden scarab?” Agent Wilson asked.

“I told you, Agent Wilson. Hundreds of little black things came out of it. They started swarming around my head,” said Nathan in a monotone voice. This had been going on for hours now.

“Hundreds?” questioned Agent Wilson. “How is it possible that hundreds of those things came from that tiny scarab? It seems impossible to me,” said Agent Wilson, flatly.

“I told you. I don’t know how it happened. But it did.” Nathan was at his wit’s end, answering the same questions repeatedly.

Agent Wilson shook his head. “All right, Mr. Gray. We’re done for now,” he said.

Nathan watched Agent Wilson as he turned and left the room. Sweat was pouring from Nathan’s face.

“What have I done?” he asked nobody, his voice cracking. “If only…. If only I didn’t investigate that damn pyramid, none of this would be happening. Good god, what have I done? How could I be responsible for all of this devastation?” He began to weep.

The door opened, and Alec entered the room. The agent that escorted him pulled the door closed and it shut with a loud thud. Alec spotted Nathan weeping and ran over to him.

“Nathan. Are you ok?” he asked.

“Alec. Oh, Alec. This is all my fault,” cried Nathan.

“What? What’s your fault? I don’t understand?” said Alec.

“This. All this. The spores. The destruction. The trouble we’re in. It’s all my fault,” Nathan said, despair in his voice.

“Nonsense, mate. You couldn’t have known there were those… those things in the queen’s chamber. There’s no way, any of us would have even dreamed that,” said Alec.

“But it was me. I was the one who…” Alec cut Nathan off, sharply.

“I said nonsense! There was no way any of us would have known. Stop this. Pull yourself together, man. We’ve got more immediate things we need to worry about!” said Alec.
Just then the door opened again, and Agent Wilson walked through the door.

“Mr. Gray. I need you and your team to immediately pack your things and get ready to leave,” said Agent Wilson.

“Leave? What do you mean leave? Where are we going?” Nathan asked

“Just pack your things and get ready,” commanded Agent Wilson. After a short pause, he added, “The President would like to speak with you.”

Nathan and Alec just looked at each other. Neither one of them said anything.


Alec shook Nathan’s shoulder and said, “Snap out of it, mate. We need to pay attention here.”

Nathan shook his head slightly and noticed everything become dark as the car continued down into the core of the mountain facility.

“It’s a bloody underground bunker,” said Alec.

“I’m surprised it still standing,” said Nathan. “Everything the American’s build is rubbish.”

“Well, Nathan, you’d better hope this place was built by foreigners. This whole damn planet is going to shit,” said Alec.

The car finally came to a stop in front of another set of doors. These were not made of concrete but metal, presumably steel perhaps even titanium. The huge metal door looked something like a bank vault door with a big wheel attached to the front of it, but also with a pair of electronic keypads, one on each door. The door was obviously unlocked as it was open wide enough for at least two men to pass through, shoulder to shoulder.

Agent Wilson was the first to get out of the car and walk back to the rear car door to let Nathan and Alec out. He opened the door. “Gentlemen, please follow me,” he said.

Nathan and Alec got out of the car and followed Agent Wilson. Others from the cars in the caravan that followed them also got out of their cars and began to follow too. They walked past the vault-like door and entered a long hallway. About a hundred paces there was another set of doors which resembled the entrance to an elevator, but there wasn’t any call button, just a black panel with a circular lens in the middle and a keypad at the bottom, about head height on the right-hand side of the wall.

Alec looked at Nathan and then at Agent Wilson, then back at Nathan. Nathan shrugged his shoulders. Agent Wilson stepped up to the panel on the wall. Nathan and Alec watched as he placed his face closer to the panel. It lit up with a bright, thin beam of red light and scanned Agent Wilson’s eye. A computer voice spoke from a speaker on the wall panel in response to Agent Wilson’s actions and said, “Identification scan. Special Agent, Harold Wilson, Secret Service.” After a short pause, the computer said, “ Identity Confirmed. Entry is permitted.” The elevator doors slid open.

Agent Wilson stepped back from the wall panel and motioned for everyone to enter the elevator. Nathan took a deep breath and followed Alec into the elevator, which was larger than he expected. Agent Wilson stepped into the elevator and looked at the floor selector. There were only two buttons. He pressed the bottom button, the elevator doors closed and they began to descend.

Nathan felt his stomach rise toward his chest as the elevator moved rapidly downward, faster than any elevator he’d ever been in before. Everyone was quiet for the ride down, so much so that he could hear himself breathing rapidly and realized he was nervous. On the way down from Washington, Agent Wilson told Nathan that not only did the President of the United States want to speak with him, but also the British Prime Minister, the German Chancellor, the French President and the Australian Prime Minister. No wonder I’m sweating he thought.

The elevator came to a halt and after a few seconds, the doors opened into a large control room. Nathan scanned the room with his eyes and noticed there were huge TV screens at the far end of the room all showing some horrific scene from different parts of the world. About two-thirds of the way in he saw a large oval conference table with finely dressed men and women sitting around the table. There were also heavily armed soldiers between where they stood now and the people at the table.

As Nathan and the rest of the party started to walk out of the elevator, Agent Wilson held his hand up indicating they should halt. The soldiers didn’t move, but it wasn’t because they were ignoring the group coming out of the elevator, it was more like they were coiled up and ready to strike at will. Agent Wilson cleared his throat. “Excuse me, Mr. President,” he said.

A man in a dark blue suit, white shirt and red tie stood up. All the people sitting at the oval table turned their heads and all eyes seem to be glaring right at Nathan. The room fell silent for only a moment, but it seemed like an eternity to Nathan.

“Agent Wilson. Is that him?” asked the President.

“Yes, Mr. President. I have brought Mr. Nathan Gray and his team, just as you requested,” said Agent Wilson.

“Good. And just in time too. We had a new development in just the past few minutes,” said the President, gravely.

Nathan’s nose crinkled in confusion. “a new development, Mr. President? What… what new development?” he asked.

“Yes, a new development, Mr. Gray. Just look behind me at the screens,” said the President. He motioned to the large monitors in the back of the room.

Nathan’s eyes widened, and his mouth fell open, speechless. On all the monitors, he saw the same thing. Reporters of every nationality all pointed their camera’s up toward the sky. On every screen in every location across the globe, the scene was the same. Massive large, black sleek alien ships hovered over Earth’s remaining major cities.

“It appears, Mr. Gray, that we have made first contact,” the President said.


End of Part II

That’s all for now folks. Please feel free to like, comment or share our journey! Let’s see how this story develops in our next installment, Part III which I will post next week!

Happy New Year!